This is my blog about random awesome things. :)

vampireapologist:

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I went through…an Ordeal today

Make Some Pocket Extenders for Your Pants

rosalarian:

quixiiify:

So I don’t know about you, but I’m often frustrated by the ridiculous smallness of girls’ pockets. At a bare minimum, I need to be able to shove my cellphone in there - come on, pants companies! So what I started doing was making myself pocket extenders. I’ve done this several times, for pants and shorts. It’s great.

I just got this pair of jeans, so I thought I’d show you how to do it. I kind of feel like it just hasn’t occurred to some of you that this is an option, so maybe now it will. All you need is your pants, some fabric (I just took a random piece from a scrap bin), a needle, and some thread (thread doesn’t even need to match the fabric since literally no one will see it).

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See? Ridiculous. Like, half a cellphone, or only 2.5″. Useless.

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 So turn those inside out to expose the pockets.

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Figure out how big you want your pockets to actually be. I kinda go by whatever looks like might be right. I didn’t really measure them. Fold the fabric in half, so you have a pocket, and then fold it in half again so you can have two equal ones.

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Try to get the edges to line up enough, pin it in place, then sew up the sides! Are your stitches crazy uneven and wonky looking? Doesn’t matter; nobody’s going to see it. These are in the inside of your pants. The only thing that matters is that it holds up. So I double-did the corners, since those tend to get the most stress.

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Cut open the bottom of the existing pockets.

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Pin it in place, then sew around, joining the new pocket to the old pocket. I did this by keeping my hand on the inside, so I wouldn’t accidentally sew through the other side. Again, I reinforced the corners, and didn’t worry about what it actually looks like. Then I turned it in side out to make sure the inside was all joined properly.

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Yay all done! And the pockets are so much bigger now!

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Whaaaat I can fit my entire phone and entire hand and probably something else now, are girls’ pockets even allowed to do that?! Heck yeah they are.

You are a goddamn hero.

ridin-in-style:

ben-cook-can-cook:

ridin-in-style:

ben-cook-can-cook:

ridin-in-style:

It is pitch black outside and someone is mowing their lawn

power move

Update: the someone is my father

does he have a flashlight

“dad did you have a flashlight?”

“no”

“how did you see?”

“moon.”

abitofgnome:

frowningfoxbones:

former-fatty:

dear-tumb1r:

topsiders-tanlines:

thespacemaid:

if anyone would like to learn a couple tricks for carving pumpkins:

- dont cut out the top to scoop out the seeds, cut out the bottom instead. this way the pumpkin doesnt cave in on itself and lasts longer
- sprinkle some cinnamon inside at the top after carving. this way when you put the candle in it smells like pumpkin pie

this is the quality content I wanna see on my dash

- rub the i sides with lemon after you’re done scooping. This will also help preserve the pumpkin

It’s fucking June, at least wait until the fourth of July, you animal.

I’m sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of me disemboweling this pumpkin.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN

couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name:

guys last night I had a dream that I became Spider-Girl but instead of spending the whole dream being lit and excited and swinging around kicking some ass like…I was just super distressed over what bra to wear? I was like “am I gonna have to just wear sports bras 24/7 now??? Those are so unflattering on me! But my regular bras would be AWFUL to wear for heavy physical activity, that’s the whole reason sports bras were made in the first place. A bralette could be a nice middle ground, but they’re also super cute and I don’t want them to get destroyed in a particularly bad fight!’ and like for a good majority of this dream I had this ENITRE inner monologue/freakout over it WHILST trying to change into my costume in a moving vehicle and when I finally got everything sorted out I tried to pull the mask on only to go ‘oh FUCK my hair!‘ and that’s the story of the time  a city was almost destroyed because it took me too long to get changed and even though I did save the day in the dream I woke up clutching my boobs in mild panic

imasmallchild:

I don’t have a train of thought I have seven trains on 4 tracks that narrowly avoid each other when the paths cross and all the conductors are screaming

nobodybetterhavethisoneoriswear:

hopelessromanticinspace:

cryoverkiltmilk:

squeeful:

ineptshieldmaid:

marzipanandminutiae:

feels-for-the-fictional:

satanpositive:

Roses are red, that much is true, but violets are purple, not fucking blue.

I have been waiting for this post all my life.

They are indeed purple,
But one thing you’ve missed:
The concept of “purple”
Didn’t always exist.

Some cultures lack names
For a color, you see.
Hence good old Homer
And his “wine-dark sea.”

A usage so quaint,
A phrasing so old,
For verses of romance
Is sheer fucking gold.

So roses are red.
Violets once were called blue.
I’m hugely pedantic
But what else is new?

My friend you’re not wrong
About Homer’s wine-ey sea!
Colours are a matter
Of cultural contingency;

Words are in flux
And meanings they drift
But the word purple
You’ve given short shrift.

The concept of purple,
My friends, is old
And refers to a pigment
once precious as gold.

By crushing up molluscs
From the wine-dark sea
You make a dye:
Imperial decree

Meant that in Rome,
to wear purpura
was a privilege reserved

For only the emperor!

The word ‘purple’,
for clothes so fancy,
Entered English
By the ninth century

.

Why then are voilets
Not purple in song?
The dye from this mollusc,
known for so long

Is almost magenta;
More red than blue.
The concept of purple
is old, and yet new.

The dye is red,
So this might be true:
Roses are purple
And violets are blue

.

While this song makes me merry,
Tyrian purple dyes many a hue
From magenta to berry
And a true purple too.


But fun as it is to watch this poetic race
The answer is staring you right in the face:
Roses are red and violets are blue
Because nothing fucking rhymes with purple.

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Originally posted by enjoythebits

Hirple - To limp or walk awkwardly

Cirple - An old Scots word for the hindquarters of a horse

“Roses are red, violets are purple,

My boner for you has caused me to hirple.”

My, how romantic!

(Source: katelizabeth)

ihavebecomethesun:

Honestly, this was so inspirational.